Have you ever, time and time again tried, attempted to achieve something, a goal, and found that time after time you don’t quite reach them. This despite all you need (or think you need) being in place, such as resources, which may be in the form of finances, people support, or opportunities, and even motivation! So what’s really stopping you?
In my coaching practice, I will often ask the client to examine any beliefs they hold around their desired goal.
Our mind, and in particular our sub-conscious mind is a wonderful thing. But sometimes it holds onto things that prevent us moving forward, protects us even, in some circumstances.
Have you ever heard of the phrase “big boned”? I remember hearing that phrase when I was young, a few times actually. My mother used to say it…”oh she’s big boned, she is”, and from a young lady years later “oh I wish I could be that thin, but I’m big boned”. Sometimes we hold beliefs, and although we have no other evidence apart from what we have been told, or a onetime experience, they stay with us and can hold us back from our goals.
So in this instance, someone may have a goal to lose weight, they may have motivation (to get into that bikini for an upcoming holiday), have the right resources (gym membership or work out DVD’s and a friend to workout with), but if they hold a quiet belief that they are big boned, then reaching their goal, will be challenging.
A fellow coach once had a client who had a belief that she was a bad driver. On further examination, she explained that she had hit the kerb whilst driving with her husband, who then labelled her a bad driver. The coach asked her how long she had been driving.
“Well four years” was her answer.
The coach then asked her how many times she had hit the kerb.
“Just that once”
And how many times, have you not hit the kerb?
The client started to laugh.
So next time a belief holds you back from a goal, examine it, and if need be change it!